Because I've knit this carboy sweater 3 times, each time taking notes and making improvements, it is time to publish a pattern to save others the trouble. When you are making this, do not dwell on the fact that you could be making yourself a sweater instead. No, no, no, that will make you bitter.
Instead, think kind thoughts about the person who spent 3 months fussing over every little detail about the sweater when she could have been making 3 sweaters for herself or 20 cat hats. And buy her pattern on Ravelry.
Because carboys with sweaters are happier, more productive carboys, they reproduce. There is an additional carboy that just appeared in our house, and since I'm not one to discriminate, it will get its own sweater.